Hello, I’m a Mac.

No, seriously.  I love Mac.  I love Apple.  I’ve had some issues with their retail stores, but it looks like the one closest to me is under new management or something and it’s like being in a different store, so I think those issues are fading fairly quickly.

So, when I tell you that I hate the Mighty Mouse, I want you to understand that this comes from a love of the products and a disappointment over the piece of shit mouse they’ve created.

The love affair with the Mighty Mouse didn’t end overnight.  I mean, to be honest, I thought the little mouse looked and acted really sweet.  Very sleek and stylish - exactly what you’d expect from Apple.  The fact that I could scroll not only up and down, but also left and right - phenomenal.

But then, one night, I went to scroll and nothing happened.  I scrolled some more - still nothing.  I clicked the little scroll buttons in the browser and they worked fine - but the scroll on the mouse - not so much.  It would go up, but not down.  I thought this odd.n  If I pushed really hard as I scrolled, it would work a little.

I noticed that this happened on not just one mouse, but two.  This was curious, so I bitched about it to a friend who told me there was a fix for it: Turn the mouse upside down and rub the scroll wheel back and forth on your jeans for a while.

I was justifiably skeptical.  I even accused him of making that up just to see if I’d do it.

“Mary?” he called to his wife while I was staring at the chat window.  “I told him to run his mouse on his jeans!”  “Oh my god - you did not?  Is he doing it?”  “I think so!”  “What a dork!”

…I have no proof that this conversation ever actually took place.

Still - can you blame me for being skeptical?  Take it apart, clean it with a can of air - these are the types of things I associate with a mouse malfunctioning and that’s the older style, trackball mice - I haven’t had a logitech laser mouse go bad on me yet.  Rub it on your jeans?  Seriously?

I looked it up.  Apparently, that really is the official solution for the problem.

I admit that it does fix the problem for a short time, a VERY short time, but COME ON!  What the hell?!  This is the best that the company who brought us the iMac can do?  This is the best that the makers of the iPod, the MacBook and the iPhone can really put on the market?  A mouse that has to be rubbed against your jeans for an hour to work properly for the next two weeks?

Where’s the quality control?  Where’s the product testing?  Obviously they know that the problem exists because they’re telling people to rub the damned things on their pants all day and night.  Where’s the fix for it?  Where’s the generation 2 Mighty Mouse?  “New and improved Mighty Mouse - won’t gunk up and stop working in the middle of your Photoshop creation!”

*sigh*

It’s very annoying.  This is not what I expect from an Apple product.

~P

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